Recipe for distress

I recieved the following e-mail from my roommate this morning, following our over-indulgent Super Bowl party yesterday.

How to make a ROTTEN ASS:

6 btls beer, preferably light
2 cups mayonnaise
1 chicken breast, boiled and finely chopped
1 tsp salt
9 lbs pasta

Mix ingredients in large bowl. Spread evenly in casserole dish and bake at 350 for 25 min. Sprinkle liberally with nachos and serve warm. Serves 1.

I hate my life right now.

Help me,
E

I would call him to share in his pain, but my throat has been scratched to shreds by a Louis Armstrong impression I was showing off all evening. Pair that with the recipe above and a 5am wake-up call. I feel like garbage.